Wedding plans have been mostly non-existent the past 2 months – mostly because we got so much done way ahead of time. In the meantime, we’ve been busy working – A LOT – to pay for this wedding. Oh, and we decided to buy a house. 

We weren’t really planning on buying a house so soon, but sometimes things just appear. We knew that eventually we wanted to get out of this condo and into somewhere that had more space. We were both in agreement that there was no way we could handle a future baby living on the 4th floor of a condo and having to constantly lug things up and down multiple flights of stairs. Yes, I know people in New York do it all the time; but we don’t live in New York, we live in Nashville.

The plan was to focus on the wedding, go on our honeymoon, then come back and start the house hunt. We’d even delayed doing any kind of lender pre-approval because we knew if we did that, it would make us want to start searching earlier. Then a couple weeks ago we were going on our evening walk and decided to venture toward 8th Avenue instead of our usual 12thAvenue stroll. We knew there had been lots of construction going on over on that side of the neighborhood and we wanted to check it out. We stumbled across one of the new developments, Melpark, and both immediately fell in love with the space. Next thing you know, we’re scheduling a walk through “just to explore” which led to “well, I wonder what we could sell our condo for.” That “just exploring” led to getting a pre-approval, making an offer and selling our condo all in a matter of about a week. We’re currently scheduled to close on both our sale and purchase July 14th. Yes, we may be crazy, but at least we’re crazy together. We are so excited about having more space, and finally, a 2 car garage! No more running to the car in the rain or dragging groceries upstairs. Most of all, we are excited about having a place that is truly ours and that we picked out together.

Planning a wedding, buying a house, starting a life together – all of these things are amazing and wonderful, but we’d be lying if we said it wasn’t a bit stressful at times. We stress about how to get it all done. Mostly, we stress about money. Do we have enough? Are we making smart decisions with what we have? How can we save more? How can we spend less? Is this a need or a want purchase? Money is a necessary evil. Can’t we just go back to the days of the barter system? We say all of this not to over-share, but to be honest. No one gives you a handbook on exactly how to do this, and it’s different for every couple. Money, from what everyone says, is the #1 topic that couples argue over. It’s a huge transition to go from only worrying about your own finances with no one’s input to having complete transparency with someone else and stepping back to analyze how you can best help each other with the financial goals you have as a couple. We’ve talked a lot about how “my” money is shifting to “our” money. It’s no longer “my” debt, but “our” debt. Any couple that says they made this transition with zero hiccups is lying. It’s tricky. It’s vulnerable. It causes arguments. Despite all this, it draws you closer if you’re willing to walk through it together. Do we have all the answers? No. But are we committed to trying to figure it out together and hopefully making decisions that make our latter years the best they can be? Yes. That’s true love – beyond the butterflies, kissy face emoticons and perfect Instagram pictures. It’s messy, it’s challenging and it’s real.

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